We are almost through all five of our neurodivergent love languages, and as you may have noticed, a lot of them don’t differ all that much between the neurodivergent and neurotypical styles. But today, we will be discussing one that actually is quite different from its neurotypical counterpart; words of affirmation.

For most people, words of affirmation is exactly as it sounds: telling someone what they mean to you or complimenting them on a physical trait or accomplishment can be quite meaningful to a lot of people.

For a neurodivergent person, however, receiving or even giving a compliment or other affirming comment may actually be quite uncomfortable or even confusing. It’s not because they don’t see or value these things, but because of a difference in communication. I don’t think that it’s any surprise to anyone at this point that a neurodivergent communication style would differ from that of a neurotypical because of the difference in the way their brains work.

Instead of words of affirmation, the neurodivergent version is… well, it’s just words. Many, many words about a topic that they are heavily interested in. And they can go for great lengths of time and into such great detail about these particular topics. it’s called “Infodumping.” And while it might not seem so, this is one way that a neurodivergent person shows that they care about you. They are willing to let you in on something that they find interesting or important in hopes that you may also find it interesting or important.

And taking that a step further, if you have a question about something they know a great deal about, be prepared for a lengthy and detailed answer. Because information should be free, and if we have it, we are going to give it to you. Assuming that we feel bonded enough to you to be able to speak to you. Because selective mutism is also a thing.

I can go into more detail about neurodivergent communication in a later post, but for now, the only thing that it’s necessary to know is that when someone infodumps on you, it is reasonable and appropriate to share with them detailed information about a topic of your interest in return. It won’t be considered rude or “changing the subject,” but more likely seen as a gesture that you, too, enjoy their company.